FRIEND IS GOING THROUGH IVF — HOW CAN YOU HELP THEM?
Many of us have friends going through in vitro fertilization. It’s a delicate topic and many people avoid talking about it. There are many ways to help your loved one, while avoiding awkward situations.
In vitro can be an emotional challenge even for the strongest. Procedures, and waiting for results often make one feel isolated and desperate. Although IVF is particularly harsh for ladies, gentlemen do not suffer less than their spouses.
You do not have to know anything about IVF to ask your friend how they feel or whether they need something. Show them that they can share with you as much as they want. Do not blame them if their reaction is not very pleasant — everyone experiences stress differently.
In vitro fertilization can be very exhausting. Some people find that they cannot handle their daily tasks as before. Help even with something mundane like shopping or walking the dog would be a great relief.
DO NOT ALLOW SELF-BLAME
It is possible for your friend to blame themselves for having to go through in vitro. It is even more difficult if there is a female infertility factor. Explain to your friend that this can happen to anyone. Remind her that ultimately her goal is to have a baby.
BE CAREFUL WITH ALTERNATIVES
It is normal to want to bring a little positivity to your friend’s life. However, it is not the best idea to suggest adoption or another assisted reproduction technology.
While adoption could be amazing, for someone going through IVF it is a reminder that they have a problem with fertility. Your friend has certainly thought of this option, but let them decide for themselves.
DON’T TALK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE’S BABIES
Some people find conversations about pregnant colleagues and baby showers extremely depressing. For others the desire for one’s own baby motivates them to spend more time around children. Determine which kind your friend is and be tactful.